to the kids who don’t know what to do

there’s this common prestige for those children who know what they are going to do from the age of crazy. when they know, or think they know, what they are going to become or pursue – and do this. they spend their whole lives working up to this and never fathom doing anything else but what their whole life has been about.

personally, i don’t agree with this. im sorry if you do, I’m not trying to insult you or say it’s wrong, i just don’t believe in your life being so about one thing, one job or one passion. and so I write to the kids, the kids who know nothing (like me) about their futures and what they want to do. and let me make one thing clear;

you are not a failure. you are not a disappointment.

theres so much social negativity out upon young people who don’t have a clear mindset of what to do or where to go. that they feel as if they are disappointment or failures, just because they haven’t decided what to do for the rest of their life from the mere age of SEVENTEEN.

i recently finished high school, and in the last two years it was all about applying to universities and choosing what occupation to pursue. out of about 150-180 students, I was one of the group of about 5 who decided to take a gap year. because i think it’s completely impossible to be able to make the one decision which practically chooses what you’re going to do in your life. nowadays its hard to get to the top without a proper degree as education is so highly looked upon. and you can’t go to university for your whole life, many people get one maybe two shots at it and have the ability to change courses or do another course when you’re older. but for the most part, people choose their ‘course’ at the age of a teen and have to stick by this for their whole life. and i’m calling bullshit.

personally, i have no idea what to do in uni. i have 3 ideas running through my mind, but how can i choose what to study when all i’ve studied before is what is manufactured for me into a syllabus to cover ‘everything you need to know’. in school we learnt what needs to be, do what has to be done, and say what has been set for us to say. its a stimulated game of doing what was given to us and trying to succeed with higher than perfect marks. and once we do everything they have told us to do, we have to choose suddenly what to do in life – after having no experience apart from the ‘maths’ ‘arts’ and all those other basic subjects “schools” find so intriguing.

and when someone doesn’t know exactly what they want to do they are shunned by society because they aren’t in control or they aren’t mature. and this isn’t fair. it isn’t fair that we are supposed to make a choice at the age of seventeen that could effect the next seventy years of our life.

and so to those kids who don’t know where or what to do, just take a breather. life isn’t over when you finish school. its just starting. so instead of trying to rush it, take a break and enjoy what is given to you. one day you will be able to make the right choice, and when it comes you will feel so much better.

 

amber, xx.

cheers to love

for my love – 

it’s a remarkable feeling; love.

the relaxed and yet ever breath taking journey of falling in love, while painful and extremely scary at times, is an experience which none others can compete with. because the harsh reality of love is: that when you open yourself up to someone, along with the fear and pain which you might encounter, you experience a perpetual happiness which you’ve never felt before. and its a beauty, an art. the art of finding someone so incredibly compatible to you that you swear by the fact that you’re soul mates. the reality of it though, is that once you fall in love, you could never imagine your life without it. and its a tug-o-war with your mind and your heart. whether you allow yourself to love someone, or whether you let the fear of losing it all win.

personally, the fear isn’t strong enough to ever make me stop falling in love with him every day. 

the ability to depend on someone, in a comfortable manner, is spectacular. because you trust them with yourself. you devote yourself to one person, hoping that they will hold you tightly in their own embrace and treasure you so highly in their soul and heart. without this close binding between two people, love wouldn’t be what it is. this “strong feeling of affection” is so much more than described as. its life changing. because when you love someone, you learn how to open yourself up for the better, how to love someone for their difficulties and insecurities, how to truly enjoy moments and make memories that will last lifetimes.

theres a certain privilege of being yours. being the one person you trust in so immensely, or want to spend time together. the privilege to be the person you love. it makes me want you to be proud of me and our love. when in love, you will constantly want to do more for the one you love. make them smile more, laugh more, enjoy more. whatever it is, you would do for them.

love, and the astounding emotions and feelings it brings to you. when you meet your other half, you can’t think of how your life would be without them, because without them it seems so much less than even just ordinary. it wouldn’t seem right. i’ve met someone, someone so perfect for me that if i ever lose them i’ll lose a part of myself because he brings out every good part of myself. i’m the best version of myself when you’re around. love makes you happy, it makes you appreciate what you have, and when you don’t have, you can depend on love to make it better. love is the sole reason for life. whether its through a lover, friends, family, passions and even hobbies. if you’re lucky enough to find something or someone you love enough to want to devote your being to make them happy and improve both your and their lives then thats an extraordinary thing.

and this is what you do for me, i love you dearly.